Elegy
by Red-Damascus-Steel
Summary: A dark place, I sit. Reality? I've lost touch. I can't forgive. I cannot forget. Here I am, blossomed before you. Vulnerable; a decayed rose whose petals flail with reckless abandon. The storm has come for me. It'll whisk me away and my blood will cater to your hunger. Feast upon my soul and ravage what is left. What you left. What remains. YAOI. A little of most genres in here...
1. Prologue

**This is an autobiography of sorts, I wrote this long ago. I left it incomplete and deleted it off of Fanfiction.**

**I'm rewriting it now with Zelda in the mix. Written in the "I, me, my" perspective. **

**This'll be YAOI**

**Those that recall my previous story, "Elegy" can now be assured it is back.**

**Here we go again…**

**Prologue **

You ever get your blood drawn? If you're like me, needles are terrifying. It's unnerving as it nears my flesh. Don't you hate that anxiety build up? "Lay out your arm please, make a fist," and all that nonsense as they tightly wrap the rubber around your arm. I felt like the doc was about to double dose me with heroine with the way I was bugging out. The doctor would tap my vein. Tap, tap… tap, tap. I could never watch as my essence left me. "Open your hand," the doctor would say as they penetrated me. I always bit my index finger until I had bloody teeth marks. It were almost as if I were to let go, my head would have exploded like I was some type of ticking grenade. Ready and willing to pull the pin; my nerves would be grated. I wanted it to end. Sometimes it can go smooth. Quick pinch; in and out. Drain me and slap on a bandage with that bit of antiseptic smeared cotton. You'd be all better in a couple of days; it wasn't so bad! However, sometimes, a vein will jump or move if the doctor doesn't do it right. "Whoops, it got away from me!" My ass it got away from you! And they'll stab you as if they're not trying. It's the worst pain and a lovely bruise will plant its ugly face on your arm for a week or so and it hurts to bend. Goddesses, does it hurt to bend! If you didn't eat, you begin to feel really woozy. You feel your blood leaving you as they drain however much they need. It's like they're sucking the life out of you. It's a terrifying experience; absolutely.

Getting your blood taken is like having friends. It's like having a lover. It's like dealing with family. It's fucking painful, particularly if it's the latter experience of being stabbed with a syringe. I can't tell you the worst part of life; the needle, the doctor or me just sitting there biting the bullet like a little bitch, but I can definitely say I always looked forward to getting a sweet chocolate bar at the end of that scarring experience. With all good comes bad and with all bad comes good. You can't have yin without yang.

So, I will give you a little bit of heaven and probably a lot of hell.

As you know me, I'm Link…

This is my life.

An elegy.

**R&amp;R if you like**

**More to come soon...**


	2. Denial

**I'm getting a lot of anxiety from writing this, ha-ha.**

**I thought very hard how to right this. This made the most sense.**

**We're rewinding, my life it'll all be jumbled up and summed. I won't be pressing it word from word. Every drama to drama. I'll put it as I see fit. Futuristic Hyrule. Condensing everything. Not everything happened consecutively in real life.**

**M RATED CONTENT/YAOI/MOLESTATION IN THIS STORY**

**Not for the faint of heart. There'll be violence later.**

**Here goes nothing. **

**Denial**

That incessant ticking actually brought me some relief. The constant click of the clock on the wall, as it had hit every second, it gave me something to focus on. At least this couch was mildly comfortable. I was sitting in a small office, it was filled with toys and trinkets for children. A woman sat across from me at her desk. A simple lamp lit the dim room. She turned to face me, her cobalt orbs and long, red hair were relaxing; I had always found pretty things to be relaxing. I buried my knuckles into my cheek and had my legs spread mildly apart. With the way I sat, you would think I'm falling off the chair. At least this seat was somewhat comfortable. I don't usually like to talk about myself. I had always seen my problems as minuscule; I'm sure other people had it _way _worse than I ever could. I could name a handful. Sure, I'm here of my own free will because… well, I'm not okay but everything has been my fault. It all is; I _let _this happen to me. I feel like a waste of life.

"I never listen to myself. I'll listen to everyone else, but never myself. Then, over time, it's become the complete opposite. I have no middle ground; I'm too easily swayed or too damn stubborn."

"What do you mean?" Malon questioned, typing away as I spoke; she must've been taking notes.

"… I'm a terrible person."

"Do you want to talk about it?" she turned to look at me once more, her gaze eased me a bit. "Tell me what makes you feel that way."

"It's a long story…" I sat up, heaving a sigh.

I already feel my anxiety rising; I fucking hate palpitations.

"Don't worry about that," she smiled softly. "I'm here to listen, this is why you're here. Everything you tell me is kept between us."

I bit my cheek and saw no harm in fulfilling her occupation; it seemed like a better idea than just sitting in silence, "Alright… where do I begin…"

…

I don't think I have ever sweated so profusely in my life. I'm excited. I'm terrified. This was so _wrong. _Every fiber of my being said, "Don't do this!" The Goddesses were lighting up signals and throwing their flares, telling me themselves to stop! I didn't care. I was new to this, all this, and it felt so _good_. Whatever makes him happy, will make me happy. I think. _Do I want this?_ I want him to love me. I just need to forget. Forget _him_.

"Link, unbuckle your pants."

That mop of ebony hair swayed as he drew me close. He trembled with excitement. He was already down to his underwear; his jeans tangled his ankles and I had just taken off my shirt. I moaned as he felt me up, teasing whatever flesh his pale hands could grasp. I gasped as he tugged me against his chest. It was happening; I was going to lose my virginity.

"Dark…" I whispered, my arousal obvious.

I leaned down, sliding my tongue passed his begging lips. Our moist appendages battled but he quelled my attempts to topple him. I nipped at his lush flesh, sucking lightly on his lip as we dive in for another kiss. I ran my fingers through his locks, tenderly pulling as he groaned. His crimson eyes were half lidded, glazed with lust, as his weeping cock peeked out from the hole in his boxers. He reached to undo my pants and just as I was about to tug them down, a sudden click startled us both. We quickly pulled away and hastily tried to cover ourselves but it was too late. The door had swung open and an extremely familiar face stared, mouth agape. His rocky features had never been so flabbergasted.

"… What're you doing?"

"Um… nothing?" Dark answered, I mentally smack myself for his obvious lie.

Darunia, my English teacher, was clearly disgusted; he left without another word. He was probably going to alert the principal. _Shit! Shit, shit, shit! _I immediately pull on my clothes and rush out the door, leaving Dark to hurriedly don himself. I stalked down the hall, not sparing a second as I hid behind a pillar. Yes, I left Dark there alone. I'm an asshole. _Damn this tiny school, damn it! Why am I so stupid?! I should've never listened to Dark! _My heart was threatening to climb out my throat. I try to swallow it down and grip my chest to calm my rapid pulse. _Fuck, fuck, fuck! I'm in so much trouble! _I crane my neck to peek over at what was to unfold. Dark exited the classroom, and the principal stalked down the hall.

"Dark, you wait right there," Rauru, an old portly man, called. "Link, get over here; I know you're there!"

I considered running away but had found this would likely hit me harder, the consequences, if I didn't face them now; it was inevitable. Muttering infinite profanities under my breath I, begrudgingly, approach the elder. He was bewildered, reprimanding us for our actions; I would go as far as to say he was condemning us, me, more so. He was ashamed that an honor student, such as myself, would do something so sordid in school. The belittlement didn't seem to end. They all had said they were gravely disappointed. Yeah, stupid me_. _Dark was an average student and less was expected from him; he even tried to put the blame on all himself but Rauru would not have it. The security guards were already spreading rumors and other students who had stayed after school gossiped through the halls. The assistant principals and guidance counselors openly expressed their distaste and I broke down as they said they'd have to call my parents.

My mother was going to kill me.

… Probably not; but she was, very figuratively, going to _kill me. _

I'm lucky her more violent years have passed. I recall her beating Vio blatantly with a broom when he had said he had lost his virginity. It was not a pretty sight. He was bruised up and had to lie to the guidance counselors.

Dark tried to calm me, whispering sweet nothings but they separated him from me. Enough of that, I suppose._ I'm going to be the blunt of every joke in this Goddess forsaken hell hole! This stupid outline square of a school, it's only one floor_! I anxiously waited as my most able guardian came to pick me up. He wasn't too far from here which made it harder to collect my thoughts. Not that I really had any; I felt utterly brain dead. With all my trepidation, I couldn't help but stare blankly at a wall. Dread filled my belly as I heard the familiar steps from down the hall.

"Are you daddy?" one of the guidance counselors greeted Rusl. "I apologize over having to inform you of the situation…"

"No, no, it's alright," he smiled. "It'll never happen again. I apologize on the behalf of Link and myself."

I resisted rolling my eyes. Everyone is being so damn dramatic. This isn't the worst thing I could've done. I was naked in a classroom, whoop de doo! Maybe the original plans were significantly naughtier than intended but we didn't fall through with it, not by choice, but still! That's what matters, right? I've known people who have done way worse. I hate this place. I don't even want to go home. I felt my phone vibrate and I immediately opened the device. _Dark… _He texted me, writing full blown apologies and questioning what to do and wondering what would happen. I texted him back, feeling just as lost as he. Rusl and I left together, not a word being spoken between us which brought me mild comfort but he had left me on edge. My nerves were fried as we drove home.

"I'm so angry with you," his knuckles paled as he gripped the steering wheel. "The only reason why I'm not saying anything is because your mother is going to give you hell."

I turned my head and heaved a sigh. This should have been a sign to stay away from Dark but I usually punch my gut and ignore it. I listen, but I don't. I don't know where my common sense had gone or if I had any really. At least, then, I did not. I don't know what was going through my head. I could only think of how _good _it felt to be _bad_; something I rarely, almost never, allowed myself to experience. Now I'm here, paying for it. Of course, I can never get away with doing something naughty. Something always stopped me. Always.

…

"Why did people, expecting you to be good, bother you?" Malon asked.

"My entire family is made up of mistakes. All they ever do is make mistakes but because I can manage good grades and desire to attend college… Mind you, no one in my family made it pass high school. They either have nothing or GEDs. My mother is the only, out of my entire family, that had pursued a college education," I frowned. "With that, they all put pressure on me to be "the one" who will probably make money and support all their broke asses. I won't become a lawyer no matter what they say. If I make a mistake, everyone goes bananas because I rarely do bad things. That's not fair to me."

"Did you ever talk it out?"

"What is there to talk about? No one listens. When I make a mistake, I make a _hardcore _mistake," I bit the inside of my cheek. "They make all these tiny mistakes, or bigger, that add up to something bigger but no one cares for that. They just see me for the giant blotch that I am and pay no mind to the little piss stains that they are."

"… Alright," she typed away. "Please, continue."

…

"I can't _believe _you!" Uli was livid, her face was eternally mortified; she hadn't settled the fact her child nearly committed adultery in a public setting. "I can't even trust you anymore! This is worse than when you were dating that 20 year old!"

I bit my lip and clenched my fists. I wanted to tell her to shut up, to not speak about him. I'm trying my hardest to forget _him_. I hate when she brought up the past; my mistakes. She was such a hypocrite, she had sex in a park when she was just a little older than me; how was that any worse? "You're not me," she would say. Well, whatever, I guess my _genetics _don't fucking matter. I guess everyone wants to forget that hormones exist. The quote was never, "Monkey see, monkey never do." Uli would always knock me over the head if I called her on things like that; she was never gentle either. My breath hitched as she brought up one of the many ways to give me a guilt trip.

"What do you have to say for yourself?" my mother pinched the bridge of her nose, easing her tears. "What would your father say?"

My eyes roamed the room and a million thoughts raced through my mind. I already said, "I'm sorry." What more does she want from me? What should I say? Should I even say anything? A question like that is best answered with silence; it was probably a rhetorical question but I'm so angry. I'm so angry with the way everyone has shut me down. Was this really that bad? I loved my father, even though I never got to know him well… he's…

"Why should I care?" I whispered; loud enough for her to hear. "Dead men can't speak."

Her expression twisted into that of horror as her hand instinctively raised and flew towards me.

…

"Is that why you feel like a terrible person?" Malon asked.

"… A lot of it stems from here," I bit the inside of my cheek, finding my gaze upon her once more. "The accumulation of my past kind of… reaches its pinnacle here. It's about this time where my life sort of goes downhill. Not that it wasn't already downhill but further, I guess?"

She nodded, "Do you want to talk about your past?"

"Maybe another session…" I turned away as she craned her neck to gaze her eyes on me.

"Tell me more."

…

Uli was furious, to say the least. I was, henceforth, grounded. They allowed me to keep my phone and computer for school purposes but I was to follow a strict "no fun" regimen. I was also ordered to stay away from Dark. I could only scoff. _Yeah, okay, I'll _totally _stay away from him now. _I'm not ready, it'll only exacerbate the rumors and I _need _him right now. I can't forget… _him_ if I don't have Dark around. He's the closest I'll get to… _him_.

…

"You seem to become stressed at the mention of that 20 year old," Malon had been typing away. "Is that who "_him_" is?"

I gave a curt nod and darted my eyes up to the ceiling. These palpitations were relentless but I wanted to fight through it. I've pent up my traumas for too long.

"Do you want to talk about him?"

I shake my head, "Maybe next session."

She egged me on to finish what I was saying, every previous session I had barely spoken. Malon wasn't going to let me stop until she had milked me dry.

…

This was all embarrassing; so embarrassing. All and sundry were aware of my transgression; my siblings and few friends dispelled the rumors to the best of their ability. I decided to stay absent the very next day. Ghirahim, Green, Red, Vaati, Veran, Dark and Zelda were doing their best to shut everyone up but they could only do so much. I had to lie to most of them, Green knew the truth because we were cousins and Dark because he was the reason this all happened in the first place. The others, I couldn't bring myself to tell the full truth. They accepted it but maybe deep down, they knew; they probably knew how filthy I was. Well, that's how everyone was making me feel.

At least I'm home... in this gross, dilapidated, railroad apartment. Roaches and mice are great company, especially, when they try and cuddle you at night. I shivered and sidled myself further under my bed covers. I lived here all my life. I hate this place. No privacy. My neighbors are all family and I can't be loud because they'll all gossip about my problems or get me in trouble.

…

"Tell me a little about your family," she turned to her computer. "You mentioned them being your neighbors?"

"Yeah, and?" I huffed, I was becoming annoyed with her constant interjection. This was already difficult to talk about. I wiped my brow. _Am I sweating?_

"From what I could gather," she said. "You don't like them, correct?"

"… I'm partial to them but they always pick on Vio and that pissed me off. I usually bit my tongue because they _are _blood but I don't get along so well with them, aside from Green and his part of the family. They don't care for me and I know it. However, Vio… they'd sooner jump in front of a bullet for him than they ever would me. I couldn't help but feel that sting of jealousy with my brother," I twiddled my thumbs, absent mindedly staring at the wall; my focus remained on that ticking clock. "It's why I never had birthday parties; I refuted them. They rarely, if ever, came for me but they'd all come for Vio and my other siblings. My brother would always ask me, "Why?" I guess it's not just not as obvious to some people. I don't know why I bother with anyone."

"I see, are you sure that's how they feel?" Malon trailed. "Maybe if you try associating with them more and talking out your problems-"

"No," I interrupted. "I've long since cut my ties with them but that's for another time. I'm not ready to talk about that."

She nodded in understanding, she kept writing on that computer, "Please, finish telling me what you were saying before."

I heaved a sigh; trying to fend off my racing pulse.

…

A familiar vibration tingled my thigh, pilfering my thoughts to focus on its buzz. I opened my phone. "1 message," I had received. I put in the code and went to read what was sent to me.

**Dark: _How you holding up, babe?_**

I pressed my thumb to the screen and wrote, "Never been better, I'm shooting unicorns and rainbows out of my ass."

**Dark: _Stop being sarcastic, are you okay?_**

I rolled onto my back and typed, "I guess… Yeah… Just kinda in hell."

**Dark: _Do you want me to come over?_**

My brows furrowed as I quickly responded, "You're not allowed to come over."

**Dark: _I know… but no one has to know if you're alone._**

I bit my lip. He was right. I _could_ invite him over and no one would know. I could get away with so much. It was tempting but…

**Dark: _We could finish what we started…_**

A smirk played across my lips as I texted him to come here. My heart began to dance with excitement. I ran to the bathroom to bathe but not before I could look at myself in the mirror. I appeared very feminine, for a guy, to a point where people would blatantly insult me and tease me for looking like a girl. Red, my twin brother, would go out of his way to punch everyone in the face but it didn't help; I was cowardice. My pride, as a man, has definitely fallen to shambles. My self-esteem left me long ago and I felt I could make up for it by pleasing this man, Dark. He would often tell me how handsome I was. Not pretty, not cute; he called me handsome. I felt a little bit of my manhood come back when I was with him. Sure, he was a little pushy, a little grope-y but he made me feel better about myself; something that hasn't been done in a long while. My green tunic and white tights should suffice.

…

"No comment, doc?" I asked, smugly.

"I'm sure your many insecurities have to do with the past," Malon kept pressing her nails against the keyboard. "You said you'd discuss your past in another session."

I bit my lip and sighed, "You're right."

My trepidation had always made it harder to speak. I couldn't help but become more sarcastic and annoyed as my heart periodically skipped multiple beats. It was frustrating. It was bad enough thinking back could break a dam but I didn't want to cry to in front of this stranger. I tried to take my sweet time as I further explained this trauma of mine without having a nervous breakdown.

…

While I waited for Dark to arrive. I decided to visit one of the very few sites I enjoyed. Fanfiction. I had made an account, username: Green-Titanium-Alloy, to review stories I had truly fallen in love with. I recently made a friend there, we had been writing back and forth, exceeding 200 plus messages and creating new PM's just to speak some more. His username was pristinehate, he had written a fantastic story called _A Bright Lie _and another called _Secure_.

We connected over the past experience of having stalkers. Weird, huh? We had been talking for a few months, almost a year, now and I've come to know him as Sheik over time and he came to know me as Link. We blossomed before each other and now we have a garden before us, full of truths and what our lives had become. I had found comfort in him and he in me and I rolled my problems to him, expecting some humor and compassion to ease my sour mood; something I would reciprocate if the situation were reversed.

…

"Sheik?" she raised a brow. "What's this Fanfiction?"

"He's my IBF," I smiled, reflecting on previous chats I've had with the Sheikah. "It's a site where you can write fictional stories about already existing characters."

"IBF?" Malon was puzzled. "What does that mean?"

"Internet best friend," I felt my anxiety ease a little; Sheik always gave that effect, even when he wasn't there. "Before you get on my case, he's real; I _know _he's real. We've opened up too much for him not to be."

"… Alright," the red head focused on the screen. "Keep going."

…

A knock on my door startled me as I messaged my friend goodbye. I shut my computer and ran to open the door. I was nervous, so _very_ nervous. I don't think I ever felt so anxious in my life. I was breaking the rules _and _doing something naughty. The rotten wooden door screeched as I tugged it open. His crimson orbs glowed as he offered that toothy grin I've grown fond of throughout the month I've known him. I gave him passage into my humble abode and gently shut the door. He removed his coat with that silly grin plastered to his face. Meanwhile, my freaking heart was ready to pop out of my chest. My trepidation was off the walls. _Do I… want this?_

I warn him, saying, "We have to be quiet, my family upstairs and next door might hear us talking; these walls are thin…"

He nodded and his eyes began to glaze over. I bit my cheek and gritted my teeth as he walked toward me with open arms. My tunic just barely covered my buttocks as Dark, gracefully, pulled me against his chest. He placed a gentle hand around my waist as he lifted my chin into the other to meet his lips. _Do I want this_? I squeaked as his hand lowered to grasp a firm cheek of mine. I suddenly shoved him away, startling him. My heart felt like it was about to burst. I had suddenly become terrified of the consequences.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I sputtered. "I'm just so nervous! I don't think I can do this…"

"Link, it's okay, you made me promise to stop when you said to," he cooed, hugging me soon after. "If you need time, I understand…"

I smiled, relieved. I felt like I was about to have a heart attack. We sat on the couch and engaged in idle conversation. Dark cracked his knuckles in the middle of while I spoke, halting my speech.

"Do you want to go in your room?" he grinned. "To cuddle? Leather isn't exactly comfortable."

"I… okay, sure," I nodded, having lost my train of thought.

We walked through most everyone's room to reach mine. It was the largest in the apartment but I shared it with all my brothers, aside from Blue who had his own room. We had a bunk bed with a third bed that pulled out from under mine. I was usually always in my room. Various drawings decorated the walls. The room was simple and a bit messy with the scattered belongings of my siblings. We didn't have too much. The apartment was rent controlled and my parent's income wasn't exactly the best but we got by better than most.

Dark hopped onto the squeaky mattress and patted the space next to him, signaling me to come hither. I crawled over to him and he pulled me close. We laid on our sides as I leaned into him and sighed comfortably. Cotton did feel better than leather. At first it was a nudge. His hot breath brushed against my ear. I figured it because he may have been falling into sleep, but, such was not the case. He began to subtly grind against me, making me frown. I tried to pull away but he only held me tighter. _I don't want this. _He kept pushing himself against my lower back.

"Dark, cut it out," I muttered.

"C'mon, Link," his hand slid down to my loins, grabbing them. "I know you want it… let's just try it…"

I sputtered curses and try to push his hand away but he held my arms to my chest as he massaged the heating area between my legs. I tried to pull my legs within myself but he kept continuing his ministrations. I groaned, clenching my eyes shut. _What if someone knocked on the door? What if someone heard? I don't think I'm ready._

"No, Dark," I whispered haughtily. "Get off."

"It doesn't hurt to try…" he teased, leaving light kisses down my neck.

I sighed, deciding he probably wouldn't stop until I gave in. I twisted myself and he allowed me to move. I sat on his pelvis, softly grinding against his crotch. His crimson orbs widened as he grinned.

"Doesn't this feel good?" he clutched my hips, keeping a steady rhythm.

I said nothing and closed my eyes. _I don't want this. _We did this for a few minutes. He sat up, grasping my neck with one hand and my waist with the other. He awkwardly flipped me onto my back while trying to keep our lips locked. He pulled off his shirt and wasted no time in removing my tunic. My heart didn't race, I didn't feel excited. _I don't want this. _He stripped completely and slipped off my tights. We were both stark naked.

He admired my body before he would devour it; he nipped my collar bone with his teeth as he traced my navel with his index finger. The stimulation was exciting me, not that I desired to be aroused but he massaged my chest as he slowly lowered his hand to my crotch. I felt him leave my neck. My brows furrowed as he played with my blonde curls and stroked me, lowering his head to graze the tip with his tongue. A little taste; he said it was like honey. He slid me into his mouth and consumed me whole, I bit back a groan. I couldn't be loud. He rubbed what he could not fit and tenderly massaged the hardened lumps just below. He seemed to move deliberately slow as I felt I could near my pinnacle. My abdomen twitched as I felt that familiar build up in my belly. Dark kept dragging it on. I felt myself on the verge of something intense, more than my standard orgasms from touching myself. I arched my back, muttering curses under my breath as white spots began to prickle my vision.

My eyes widened as his ministrations came to a sudden halt just as I was about to burst, I whispered, "No, no!" My entire body shuddered and trembled. I couldn't fight the steady stream that fell from the corner of my cerulean pools. It hurt. I couldn't explain but it _really_ fucking hurt. I needed to let go and he denied me. I felt myself begin to go limp.

"Are you crying? Did it feel that good?" he chuckled, guiding his hand to my limpness. "You're such a whore…"

I frowned as I went to push him away. He pinned my wrists above my head, kissing me softly. "So handsome…" I momentarily ceased my struggling as he stroked until I had hardened once more. He slipped his fingers into my mouth and pressed against the insides of my cheeks, tickling my tongue. He pulled them out, a string of spittle following as he neared my orifice. He gently teased my entrance and I groaned, uncomfortable. He slipped in two digits and began a slow, steady pace.

"I love you…" he whispered, he pressed his lips against my own. "So beautiful…"

"It… hurts…" I muttered between breaths, my face was flushed. "… Stop…"

"It'll feel better soon," he twisted his fingers inside me, making me twitch and curse; I wanted to trust his words. I wanted him to love me.

He chuckled and slipped out his fingers. It was replaced by something bigger. I looked to see his, slightly larger than average, length pressing against my entrance. I was terrified and nervous. He could see it. He gradually eased in. He tenderly clasped my buttocks as he neared the hilt. It burned. I've never been stretched so far before. I swear, something ripped. Hissing in pain, I tried to lower my voice so I wouldn't get in trouble but I mumbled for him to stop.

"Relax, babe, you're making this harder on yourself…" he grunted. "Goddesses, so tight…"

Dark groaned in obvious bliss as he filled me. Every tear drop fell to my sheets with each plunge that did nothing but make me feel a little emptier inside. He laid on top of me, no longer holding my wrists. His pace was steady. My nails scraped his back, occasionally throwing my fist at his ribs if the pain was too great. He was heavier and stronger. Nothing perturbed him. It was almost as if he heard or felt nothing as I quietly cried, begging him to end this. Maybe I wasn't loud enough. I was sweating. It was hot; the friction was unbearable. He had buried himself into the crevice of my neck and I laid there, having ended my futile endeavor.

Why had nothing come to stop this? Something had always come to stop me before anything could escalate. Yet, here I was, caught. I had gotten what I wanted. Did I deserve this? Is this my punishment for trying something bad? Dark pulled his head up, he stared down at my cerulean pools. My gaze had fallen to the wall as my tear ducts had dried. Wet tracks had lined my cheeks. I felt him pull out of me, my muscles were sore and tender. He laid by my side and said nothing. We spoke in a low register.

"… Why didn't you stop?" I whispered hoarsely, my throat was a bit strained from my resistance to cry. "You promised."

"I thought maybe if I had kept going, it would feel better for you but you weren't enjoying it…" He trailed off. "I didn't hear you say stop."

"You didn't hear me say stop? You didn't feel my punching you? Scratching?" I balled my fists. "Are you _serious_?"

He said nothing. He, at least, seemed regretful of his actions but my rage could not be quelled. I smacked him across the face, bitter salt drops somehow escaped my cerulean pools once more. He held his cheek, questioning what was wrong with me.

"What's wrong with me?!" I was furious. "What the fuck is wrong with you! Get out of my house!"

Multiple emotions flashed through his crimson orbs. Regret and grief were the most evident. He obeyed my words and made his leave after donning his clothes. I quietly dressed myself, not before I noticed that I was bleeding. I gasped when I grazed the torn flesh. I resisted punching a wall and crawled back into bed, grabbing my computer. Hopefully, Sheik would be there to ease my pain.

**pristinehate: _PM's are a bitch. Text me when you're back! My number is 7182359302. Message me when you're back! _**

I blinked back in surprise. I immediately went to grab my phone and texted the number and added him to my contacts. The gloom I had felt before suddenly lifted as my heart raced with excitement. A grin slapped my face after I received a response no more than a minute later. Sheik was a few years older than me but we connected better than people I've known for years. He always knew how to make my heart flutter. I couldn't help but have that stupid smile because he knew what strings to pull; he knew how to make me laugh and feel better.

**Sheik: _How about we call? I have some time before there's something I've got to do._**

I bit my tongue, resisting the urge to squeal; my serotonin levels must have been off the charts. I've never heard his voice before but we were tighter than a sailor's knot. I couldn't explain this bond, not to my friends or family. We just clicked and we had each other's back better than a hungry lion's grip on a gazelle. He was my brother. It was too bad he lived a couple thousand miles away. I called him.

"_Hey_!" his voice, silvery, held a small accent. "_What's up, Link-y-kins_?"

"Hiya, Sheik-y!" I rubbed the back of my neck. "Nothing, just… kinda had the worst experience of my life."

"_What happened_?" I could sense his pout. "_Who do I have to punch_?"

"Well…" I told him my experience.

I was a bit numbed by it now. Just talking to Sheik pulled me out of my funk. I left out the intricacies and told him the basic of the details and how it ended. I recalled the fact we were both virgins, albeit, Dark had more experience than me regardless of his virginity. I was feeling lost.

"_You smacked him_?" he sounded a bit shocked. "_That poor guy; he must be traumatized_!"

"I…" I mused, brows furrowed; Dark did seem to feel genuinely bad. Technically, it _was _also his first time. My insides began to twist a bit. "… Yeah, it didn't go too well…"

"_I remember when you used to tell me how you had the hots for him! How he would stare at you from across the room; I recall all the good stuff you told me about him_," the Sheikah chuckled. "_I remember how you said he'd go out of his way to try and talk to you and Zelda would be a cock block, ha-ha. Are you gonna let all that go?_"

_Did I over react? This was probably my fault. I probably wasn't loud enough. I should've said no from the start. I should've just… maybe it was just me. I should probably fix things…_

"I should probably text him…" I laid down. "I'll fix it up; it was just a bad experience."

"_Alright, I have to go, Link_," Sheik said. "_Text me later_!"

I decided to text Dark and apologize.

…

"Are you still with him?" Malon seemed to shift her tone towards sympathy.

"I am…" I said, my neck is leaned back as I stare at the ceiling. "What of it?"

"When did this happen?" she was typing away.

"Like… four years ago," I took a deep breath, jittering my leg. "How long is this session?"

"We're just about up…" Malon turned to face me. "You realize he took advantage of you, right? I would think that constitutes as rape regardless of whether he finished the deed or not."

"That's what Veran said; she cried when I told her," I got up, slipping on my jacket. "I didn't give Sheik the full details; I didn't want to. Maybe he misinterpreted it. Regardless, I hold his opinion in high regard." I zipped up my coat. "Veran had changed my thoughts, which brings me back to… _him_, that 20 something year old. Everything went to hell because I told Veran. Like I said, I'm easily swayed, doc. Maybe that's why I'm molested all the time."

"Listen, Link," Malon frowned. "You have to realize-"

"I don't really look at it as rape," I cut her off, pulling on my hat. "Not anymore. I just… I don't know. I invited him over. I set the stone, I guess. It was my fault. I'm not going to argue."

"… Link, make sure you come back Tuesday," Malon said, typing the rest of her notes on her computer. "You need this."

"Alright, doc," I twisted the knob open and shielded my eyes from the bright light. "… See you Tuesday."

…

**There are some things that did happen, some things that I had wanted to happen, and some things that could have happened if I had let them. **

**This was a lot of pages. Eesh… Eesh. Now, before you wonder, I'll give you this. Everything concerning Dark is true. However, I was collapsing one of my experiences with another which was with the same guy. Everything else, I'll leave you to figure out on your own.**

**I couldn't create one character for everyone I had known. So, I kind of mashed it all up with certain characters. Some people _do _have their own characters. And… well, one character is everything I want to be. I'll leave you to figure that out.**

**R&amp;R if you like**


	3. Tick

**Every chapter will bounce between therapy sessions and current life so, kinda like a double whammy of sorts. They might be separate or together.**

**Past and present.**

**This chapter is a bit of both.**

**Tick**

"We moved out from the apartment a few months ago into a house that was passed down from my great grandmother," I stared blankly at the clock. "Ever since, I seem to have a semblance of peace now but I'm still hot and bothered."

"Your past?" Malon asked.

"It was a constant occurrence," I frowned. "Like this never ending cycle of bull shit that seemed to follow us but it's getting better; it definitely wasn't as bad as before."

"Would you like to talk about it?"

"That's what I'm here for, aren't I?" my leg began to jitter. "Oh, and doc, keep your questions until after I finish talking."

…

"YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP! DON'T TOUCH ME!"

"DON'T YOU DARE, YOU DIRTY MOTHER FUCKER!"

"YOU FUCKING BITCH! I HATE YOU!"

I felt sick, so sick. My throat was constricting as I twisted in my bed. "Holy fuck, man," I whispered passed my quivering lips. I tightly gripped my baseball bat; my palms were sweating so much that I could've sworn it were all blood. I felt like a kiln left on during the weekend with closed doors. Every night, every fucking night they did this; I hate this. I struggled to pull that little bit of air into my lungs. My heart pulverized my torso as my entire body quaked. Red was sleeping silently beside me, how the hell could he sleep through all this? How could anyone sleep through this?

"YOU'RE A FUCKING LOW LIFE! I DON'T EVEN WANNA BE WITH YOU ANYMORE!"

"YOU'RE A CUNT! YOU'RE NOT GOING NO-FUCKING-WHERE!"

"FUCK YOU!"

They're so stupid, just break the fuck up. It drove me insane; in fact, I'm pretty sure I've reached the brim of insanity. At least, that was what I'd like to think. It was two in the morning and I had class tomorrow and they were pulling this. My hands trembled as I pushed myself up, my legs were unsteady as I pressed my weight onto the splintered wood. Heaving a sigh, blood leaked from my chest and down my ribcage; anxiety was unrelenting as I fought this compelling cowardice. I need to end this. I trailed for the inevitable.

"I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT!"

"YOU'RE A WHORE, I'M GOING TO-!"

"You need to get out of this fucking house!" I shouted, my voice cracking under the pressure as I steadily lifted my weapon. "NOW!"

There was a pause as they were caught in stupor. My breath raged wildly and I grappled myself to keep it under control. Lines deepened their sour expressions, as if upset by my intrusion. The man with the familiar green skin and offset ginger hair scowled as he lowered his hands. His golden orbs pierced mine as they gazed back to my brother. Vio grit his teeth, relief filled him with my immediate presence but he became stone soon after; the awkward silence needed to be broken but I was beaten to the punch before my lips could part.

"Even your family hates me now," Ganondorf balled his fists. "You're nothing but trouble!"

"You're the one who started this, Ganon!" Vio yelled. "All you ever _DO _is cause problems for me!"

"Enough!" I tightened my sweaty grip on the bat. "You need to go!"

Before Ganondorf could spout some ridiculous insult at me, my brother spat his venom, "This doesn't concern you, Link."

My brows furrowed as I spoke breathless, "What?"

"This has nothing to do with you," his voice steadily rose. "Get out."

"This has everything to do with me!" I grimaced, tossing the bat aside, and pressed my hands to my chest as I felt hot beads dribble past my cerulean pools. "Don't you see what you're doing to me?!"

His face crumpled into something ugly as he approached me, "What I'm doing to you?! No one is doing _shit _to you! Stop trying to make everything about yourself, these are _my _problems!"

"You do this every night with that piece of fucking shit!" I pointed to Ganon who held nothing but that permanent smirk; my brother was defending this garbage heap. "This isn't healthy! You mess up everything around you! It's not fucking fair, there are days where you scream my name to help you! I'm your little brother, it's not the other way around! I cut off half the family for you! You're selfish; I can't sleep because of you! All you do is fight and fuck-!"

Vio was furious as he entangled his fingers in my hair. With a swift grip and tug, he dragged me around. My brother may have been slightly smaller but he was sure as hell stronger; any fight I might give to him would be the equivalent of a raucous teddy bear. I cried out as I clawed at his wrist. I opened my clenched eyes and saw his fist fly towards me. It was all happening so slow, it was as if the Goddess slackened her time in my favor. Either that, or she wanted me to remember every visceral detail of my dire situation. I felt so damn heavy, like I was lugging a few pounds of brick on my back as his knuckles inched toward my face. Deciding to use this adrenaline rush to my advantage, I shoved his fist aside and pulled him down, slamming my knee into his gut. His hold on me loosened enough to thrust him backwards. I suddenly felt so tired. Vio, enraged, sent flurries of punches towards me as I dodged them all, parrying a few and provided blows of my own which did little to deter my brother. Goddesses, why was time so sluggish? And Ganon just enjoyed the show; I'm so tired of this. I turned my back on my brother, much to his surprise, and walked back into my room. Vio, never understanding the concept of restraint, followed with orbs blazing.

"Red, wake up," I shook him, stirring the slumberous creature. "Red-!"

A grunt escaped my lips as I was tackled and shoved around until I was firmly held against plaster. His hot hands clasped my neck as I felt myself slightly lifted off the ground. I grabbed his shoulder and squeezed, kicking furiously as he grabbed a chunk of my hair.

"I don't like how you talk to me," he growled, shoving me hard against the wall as he tore a fistful of follicles from my scalp. "No respect!"

My face scrunched as my jaw fell open but no scream would permit itself to leave.

The racket awoke everyone, aside from Rusl who slept with ear plugs and likely kept himself asleep regardless of any matter. However, Red was the first to assess the situation and reacted without a moment's hesitation, he caught my offender in a chokehold and forcefully removed our brother. Unfortunately for Vio, Red was the strongest between us and could beat his ass at the bat of a lash. He was the only one who could really put Vio in place aside from our mom who stepped out seconds later.

"What the hell is going on here?" Uli shouted, gawking at us.

"Your _son_," Vio spat at me. "Is the problem."

"What happened?"

She was given no response. I bit my tongue, placing a tender hand on my scalp as my eyes became bloodshot; I'm tired of this. Vio and I were glaring at one another. He shoved Red off as he demanded to be let go of. He obliged with raised arms and came to my side. Red tried to explain to the best of his ability of the situation based on the culmination of complaints I've given him over the past couple of years and a frown sat grossly on Vio's face as he brazenly perforated the only mirror in our room, shattering it to pieces seconds after impact. "Oh well," was all he had said. "Guess, you'll have to buy another one." You would think our last names were moneybags with the way Vio thought we could flounder cash but we were pretty poor; inconsiderate, unappreciative bastard.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Uli was infuriated. "Get out, get out!"

So he did. He left with Ganon. He would sleep in the street with him but I'm sure the loyalty wouldn't be reciprocated if Ganon had the option. Ganondorf was kicked out of every place he had gone to; he was bad news. Uli being the kind soul she was, allowed him to sleep here and the situation turned into something perverse; they had gone beyond control and he over stayed his welcome. What was my brother in his presence had long past my recognition. We didn't know; manipulators have a way of worming around until you dig up the dirt. I curled into bed and Red tried to offer me comfort and my mother tried to harass information out of me but I shunned them both and buried myself under my quilt. I don't want to talk anymore; nothing ever works when I talk. This was utter nonsense. Who, in their right mind, would put up with this?

Red had found himself fast asleep after the incident, knowing I wouldn't budge. It was times like this where I would have texted Sheik. As fondly as I had spoken of him with my therapist yesterday, he had disappeared for over a year. I would text him on holidays and birthdays but I had received no response. I held in the snot and let my rivers flow, I would text him anyway, even though I would receive no response. The idea alone that he may read it brought comfort and I could picture his response and the silly things he'd say and that alone was enough to ease what I had felt. He was so easy to talk to; he knew all the right things to say, something I was never as easily able to do. Maybe I'm the bad friend. Maybe my lack of words, my lack of physically being there led to our downfall. Maybe it's just me. Sheik had a life; he had real friends, why wouldn't he trade me for them? They probably brought more comfort than I ever could. The Sheikah always had a million problems, infinity times worse than mine, which was why I never held anything against him; I could never bring myself to but I can't say it never hurt either. I never liked talking about myself anyway; I was always a great listener.

_It was one in the morning, my phone vibrated non-stop and I had found myself awoken from my slumber. I picked up my phone, hearing the distinct call of the harp ringtone that I had deemed Sheik's theme. It was the Sheikah and I did not hesitate to respond._

_"Hello?"_

_"Hey, Link, did I wake you?" his voice was solemn._

_"No, not at all, I was already up," I covered the microphone and yawned, rubbing my eyes as I shook myself awake. "What's the matter?"_

_"I called all my other friends and you're the only one who will pick up the phone when I need someone to talk to," Sheik seemed to laugh bitterly at his realization. "You really are my best friend, it just sucks that you're so far away."_

_"… I know, Sheik," I leaned against the bed rest in my daze. "I'll always be there for you, no matter what. Tell me what happened."_

_It bothered me some that he was shocked that I had answered but I digress and so he spilt to me his problems or what he could until his real friends returned his calls. He dropped me within seconds which never troubled me so much. It was what he said at the end, "I'll call you back." I waited and decidedly fell asleep with no guilty conscious because no call was ever returned. Aside from maybe one time which sparked a bit of hope within myself only to be snuffed again. I felt bad for feeling surprised and explaining so when he once did as he promised because Sheik wasn't seeing it the way I did so I kept to myself to make him feel good; I never wanted to add more problems to his plate with my emotional constipation. _

_This would happen a few times, a repeat with the same spoken words yet with different issues and each time I had become more skeptical when he would say he'd call back but I shrugged it off. I'm sure he had every reason; I'm not his obligation but I began to wonder why he said it. Was it to make me feel better? It always stung a little, did he forget me unintentionally? I loved the Sheikah; I'd wait for him no matter because he was like a brother but now I never received anything and I began to wonder if I had pushed him away somehow. Regardless, I would still wait; Sheik had been through hell and back, on more than one occasion, and I would wait for his return but as months had gone by… I began to question myself but Sheik never left my mind and I supported him whole heartedly and over time I texted his phone less and less; only in my time of need would I bother his number. _

_He invaded my thoughts infrequently as time passed, the image of him greeting me when struck by a fond memory which became blurry with every passing month. We used to call each other all the time, sometimes we'd stay up all night and text all day; it all suddenly became a rarity as he eventually disappeared. Any hope of his return drowned as I had hit my darker years without Sheik's wisdom and humor to guide me but I pulled through, as an emotional wreck but I pulled through nonetheless._

...

"Is that obsessive, doc?" I wondered aloud. "Do you think I'm obsessed with Sheik?"

"A little, not necessarily…" Malon sighed as she tapped away on the keyboard. "But he doesn't sound like the greatest friend."

My brows furrowed as I spat venom, "What are you insinuating? He's a good person. You don't know him at all!"

Her brow raised at my hostility and I sighed, "I'm sure if I had talked it over with him, he could understand my frustration but something like this can easily push someone away. Miscommunication can tear apart years' worth of a relationship over a text or anything really. That's why I'm so careful with what I say to him; I want to be there to help him. He can't see my gestures, my expressions, and my anxiety… I don't want to lose him because I want to be a little selfish; I have no right. His problems make _me _cry. Sheik has his own life to live. We're too far apart. If Sheik disappears, he slowly backs away and vanishes within a flash. That's just his thing… I find it so hard to make him laugh in his darkest times, I'm not as humorous as he. Hell, he makes himself laugh because humor is all he has when no one is there and I feel utterly useless. I'm not the 'best' friend out there but… I don't think I'm terrible. I'd stick with him through thick and thin and that's what counts, right?"

She nodded and typed away, "Do you still talk to him?"

"… No," I listened to the incessant tick of the clock as I pressed my chin into my palm. "He's been gone for so long."

"Why don't you message him through that fanfiction site or email?"

"I… I've thought of that, doc," I spoke sourly. "I just figured he never updates, he probably doesn't even bother with fanfiction anymore."

"I'm sure he'd get notifications like any other app," Malon shrugged. "It wouldn't hurt to try since you seem to find Sheik invaluable."

"… Alright, I'll send him a message tonight."

"About your brother, Vio…" she scrolled through her notes. "What did you mean when you said you had cut ties with the entire family?"

"… I guess we have to go there at some point, huh?" I tapped my fingers against my thigh as the wave of palpitations filled me. "Alright, we can go there. I'll cut it short because… I don't like recalling this memory."

"Alright."

"No one really liked Ganon but we still stood by my brother. Every night on the stoop, my family upstairs in the old apartment would get drunk until their livers would bleed ethanol. A few extra members and family on their side, not my blood, were invited over; I didn't like the lot of them anyway. This was all over a misunderstanding… because they were drunk beasts. They jumped Ganon and my brother along with Ganon's mothers and younger sisters who had come to pick him up." I pinched the bridge of my nose, my hatred rose at the very mention of those bastards. "It was like sport for them; it was like watching the Discovery Channel on crack. They had no remorse and spouted so much hateful garbage to us. They even tried to rob my brother in that process. What kind of fucking family is that? They weren't so badly harmed which I like to think was my passed loved ones protecting them but… the act alone was grotesque. Drunk animals; that's all they were."

"How did you cut ties?"

"I went onto Hyliabook and told the truth. I had to; everyone would just accept their drunken apology and let them rampage once more. These stupid fights happened, just not at the intensity that had occurred that day. I said what they were and how every bit of what they did was wrong and they _refused _to apologize after what they did. They tried to make us look like the problem, insulting my mother. I was absolutely livid. My mother was driven to tears. Of course, I chose my words _very _carefully. No one person could pin point themselves to any one thing and I was free of charge. Whatever they found themselves to be, it's because that's what they _were_; guilty damn conscious. My parents and brother supported me the whole way and I never talk. Goddesses know, I've never spoken out against anyone except in this one infuriating moment that will never leave me," my legs were jittering as wet tracks lined my cheeks. "And it hit them all like a ten ton brick. And of course, those who live a lie will deny every bit of truth until it kills them. So, I cut those ties and they theirs but not without insulting me with every last fiber of their being. And of course, they made no effort to bind ties with me because they never tried to establish a relationship with me in the first place. I was a primrose path, the epitome of my mother's success and mother had made something of herself while the others stood rooted in their lack less ambition, I looked like her and upheld her standards in education and I'm attending college. Their envy was gross and they pressed it on me. They tackled Vio, my polar opposite, and tried to snatch my mother back but my mother stood by my side and my brother eventually faltered and made me look like an idiot; he accepted their drunken apology and I felt sick because while I stood next to him, they insulted me and my brother did little to defend me. Do you know how that_ feels_? To go out of your way to help someone you love only to be stabbed in the fucking back?"

Malon stared at me sympathetically and nodded, typing away, ushering me to continue.

"But my love is squandered wherever I go. My mother eventually talked to them again, not as much. She kept her distance and didn't invite them over to the new house. Thank the Goddesses because, I swear, I'd go _fucking_ insane if I were alone on this," my chest rose and fell tumultuously as Malon handed me a tissue. "They never loved me to begin with so why should it matter, right? It hurts when everyone goes to all your sibling's birthday parties but only Vio and my parents come to mine; every year. Even those who I thought were close didn't bother. They get showered with gifts and I've none except occasionally from my parents if they could afford something nice; if I even _asked _for something nice. It _fucking _hurts when no one cares. They won't even see me once a year. If they visit; it's for everyone else. It's been that way since I was a child and they wondered why I stood in my room, why I locked myself away and never talked. Their envy and hatred watered down to their children. How do they _expect _me to feel?! It fucking stinks because I _wish _I were an idiot sometimes because maybe then, if I weren't so aware, they would have loved me. Maybe then, I wouldn't feel this way… but maybe I'm just being childish but how should one feel when starved of affection?"

"You can't think that way, Link," she spoke with so much compassion, it must be years of practice within this field that made her sound so convincing. "You're a good person, some people are just the way they are and we can't pick and choose our family."

"I won't accept that, people are just the way they are," I blew my nose into the tissue. "Anyone can change if they try to, they're happy in that filth of a lifestyle; every day they drink, every day they would beat their children, every day they would do drugs, and every day they would fight. Who the hell wants to live that way?"

"Everyone handles themselves differently," she kept her gaze on me. "I'm sure they have their own problems…"

"I know they do and they should invest in some Goddess damn therapy and anger management!" I scowled. "I'm fully aware of what they've been through, some really fucked up stuff, but they can't use that as an excuse for their actions forever. They're not children or teenagers, they have to pay for their consequences but I suppose they pay for it enough by wallowing in their misery. Charity work for strangers won't make up for all their transgressions."

Malon typed away.

"How much longer do I have for this session?"

"We have a few more minutes…" her brows furrowed slightly as her face pressed into her screen. "But before you go, are your brothers living with you in the new house?"

"Blue took the apartment, my oldest brother, with Vio and Ganon but Vio was kicked out because of Ganon so he's with us now," I rubbed my chest, alleviating the pressure I felt. "Ganon isn't allowed at the house anymore, at all, they were pulling the same crap again so the neighbors threatened to call the cops and my parents set Vio straight immediately. I mean, I'm happy to have Vio at the house. He's seriously considering leaving Ganon and he's actually going to get a job maybe… I hope it's legitimate. He's an entirely different person when Ganon isn't around; I love him and he knows that. I can better protect him here from all the crazy back at the apartment and Ganon, physically at least. He'll scream and bitch with him on the phone, I can deal with that during the day but he's starting to see Ganondorf is a true psychopath and not worth it. Vio is still young, there is so much to live for."

She was probably typing 'savior complex' on that little screen.

"That's good, okay, Link," she smiled softly. "Our time is up, I'll see you next week."

"… I'm not saying I'm perfect or innocent, I'm the farthest from it but there are people who are way more messed up in the head than I am and when I come across them… if they want it; I'll help them because that's something I'd want someone to do for me," I gathered my belongings, "See you next Thursday, doc."

…

It was late, a bit cold. I adjusted my scarf as I pulled it over my reddened nose. Alright, a little too cold. Blizzards have been flying in and out of Termina. I looked up as I walked down the darkened pathways. Little flakes of ice fell in the silence, aside the occasional holler of drunkards and teenagers as I walked down the steps of West Clock Town. Snow littered the buildings and floor. I smiled with every gratifying crunch under my boot. I love the snow, as bitter as it may be. On cold nights, you could see the stars so crisp. I star gazed often, to ease my mind. I looked up as I swaggered down to my house in South Clock Town, something still foreign to me. I used to live in West side (A small move I know) but we have a lot more space now and pay the same amount for the apartment. The snowfall was magical, I love how it clung to trees or created hills of fluff to jump in and the icicles as they glisten in the sun or as it all melts under the snow, creating their own little river banks. Once I had my blood pumping, I did just fine.

A whimper caused me to turn. My eyes widened as I gazed upon an abandoned pup. The hoary fella seemed lost and frozen with ice chunks stuck to its fur. I frowned and kneeled down, who would leave such a defenseless animal out in this weather? I whistled and called him with an open palm, "Come here, little guy, it's okay; I won't hurt ya." The pup seemed reluctant, anxious and very unwilling as it backed away. I decided to scoop up the little guy before it could flee and deal with it as it chewed on the sleeve of my jacket; a mutt, I could tell by its size. It was part dog, part wolfos, and part wolf. He had a combined quality of each. I checked him, it's a he, and he had no collar or any sort of ID. He was actually pretty cute, kind of small but he was a vicious little guy; probably a runt.

I fumbled for my keys, my hand burned as I played with the metal ring as I held the pup in the other, flipping each one until I had found the key that would fit. I pulled open the door with a swift twist and sighed as I stepped into the warmth that consumed me. Uli was probably going to be upset as soon as she would see the little monster I had brought home. I smiled as I closed the door behind me and kicked off my boots at the welcome mat. I put the pup on the floor and let it roam around the house. The thick carpet must have felt nice on his long nails, easing the pressure on its paws. I watched him shake its matted fur. The pup was probably soaked to the bone, poor thing. I took off my jacket and walked into the kitchen.

We had a dog before. He passed away a few months before so we still had bowls. I filled one with water and placed it on the floor as I scavenged for meat in the fridge. I heard the pup desperately lap at the silver dish. I found some meatloaf and heated it up in the microwave. I mushed it all up with a fork and scraped it into the other bowl. I watched his tail wag as I placed the plate in front of him. He hungrily devoured the meat and I smiled, "Such innocence…" His ears perked at the sound of my voice but his face remained toward the earth as the pup gobbled every bit into his mouth. I observed him, his hind legs were smaller than his front paws. His back hunched just slightly but he still looked similar to most normal dogs. His head was thick and his ears were pointed; his jaw was square. His eyes were golden and his fur was a mixture of black, grey and white. His snout was a bit long; his tongue sidled past his black lips and pearly fangs. His black button nose snorted as he sneezed.

"Bless you!"

This little guy needed a makeover. I scooped him up and took him to the bathroom upstairs. I set the water to a bearable heat and lugged the pup in. I pulled the shower head down and hauled over some shampoo we still had from our previous dog. I scrubbed him down. He bit me a hell-a-lot but I still fought to clean him and melt the ice. I could tell he secretly enjoyed it, I noticed his leg would thump a little if I scratched the right spot. I grabbed a pair of scissors from a drawer and began to cut up matted fur. Now, this time, I reprimanded him if he attacked me and gave him a snack every time he sat down. Not too long after, he got the message and behaved a bit as I cut him up. The dirt swiveled down the drain and his hair clogged the stopper. He looked so thin and his head so big; his body was uneven but that's a mutt for you. I evened out his hair and grabbed a brush to stroke his fur. Oh, yes, the pup looked so happy. As I finished, I scooped him out the tub and wrapped him in a towel.

The distinct click of the door downstairs alerted me someone was home; I bolted down the stairs with the ball of wrapped fluff to see Red, "Say hello to our new roommate!"

"Huh?" Red absent mindedly pulled off his jacket and hung it in the closet. "What're you talking about-OH! That's a dog!"

"Yes! Isn't he adorable?" I rubbed him with towel as he nibbled on my fingers. "I found him wandering the streets… he would've caught his death out there."

"Um, I'm not sure mom and Rusl will feel about…" he tried to pet the pup but it snapped at him. "This little guy."

"He's a still a pup, we can still train him," I grinned. "What do you say? Will you back me up on this? C'mon, Red!"

"Alright, alright," he rubbed the back of his neck. "Just don't get too attached to it."

"Him, and his name is Sid," I kissed its snout as I slipped it another treat.

"Oh, dear Goddesses, you named it," Red sighed as he shook his head; he pulled out an old rope toy and tossed it to me. "Let him chew on this. His teeth probably hurt."

I grinned and put Sid on the floor and let him scamper around. He bolted around the house. I guess he wasn't used to having so much space to romp in; the little guy must feel rejuvenated. The hoary pup rolled all over the carpet, growling and barking. It was quite the sight. As he eagerly chewed on the rope, I plopped on the couch alongside Red. We stared at the ticking clock on the living room wall.

"How was the-rape-y?" his eyes focused on the wagging tail that seemed to move at 30 miles per hour; he fed Sid a treat.

"Therapy was fine," I rubbed my forehead. "I can't seem to keep my mouth shut lately."

"The-rapist, therapist," he softly laughed to himself but quieted soon after I punched his shoulder. "When you lock everything away for over 17 years," he sighed. "It's bound to happen one way or another."

"I guess," I looked my twin over; I was envious of him. "How was work?"

"Great, I'm being promoted next week to manager," he jutted his thumb to his chest with a charming grin.

"That's great," I smiled and fell into his chest as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "That's good to hear."

"I'll take you out to dinner this weekend or for some ice cream," Red twirled my hair in his fingers. "How does that sound?"

"Dark is probably coming over…"

"Forget Dark," he frowned and flicked my forehead. "Just you and me, okay?"

"Alright…" I pulled out my phone, deciding to follow through with Malon's advice.

"What're you doing?" he chuckled. "Fanfiction? You still write that yaoi stuff?"

"I do," I stuck my tongue out at him. "The doc said to message Sheik."

"Sheik, huh?" he rolled his eyes. "Your boyfriend?"

"He's my brother."

"No, _I'm _your brother," he scoffed. "That's just your friend who obviously keeps disappearing on you; someone you've never even video chatted with. You used to tell me he would but he'd either stop talking to you or just didn't want to or whatever. You like him more than as a friend, Link. How do you know you're not being cat fished? Besides, Dark is going to think you're cheating on him."

"Oh, please, Dark can suck a big fat nut," I sighed, exasperated. "If I liked him, wouldn't I have been jealous of his girlfriends and he jealous of my boyfriends? You just wouldn't understand, besides, Sheik could be thinking the exact same thing. Never in a million years would dating him cross my mind and Sheik is straighter than Lily Burana's stripping pole."

"She's a sweet lady."

"A sweet lady indeed," I created a message to send to pristinehate. "I haven't talked to him in over a year. I'm just going to try and reach out to him; if he doesn't respond then I know he's either gone off the Earth or just isn't interested in talking to me."

"Sounds good," Red tousled my hair.

**Green-Titanium-Alloy: **

**_Hey Sheik, _**

**_You probably don't check this anymore, fanfiction, and I'd understand if you don't respond. Nostalgia decided to break my nose with the hard smack I was given but, ah, I was just wondering… how you've been? I hope you're doing alright; actually, I would you're doing great._**

**_… Sorry, I'm an ass._**

**_I know you've gone through some terribly rough times and I really hope you're okay. I'm sorry if I'm bothering you in any way, I'll leave you be, just ignore me now._**

**_Good luck with it all,_**

**_Link_**

I clicked send and Red rolled his eyes, having read my message, "You're way too emotional, you know that?"

I pouted and shoved him away, deciding to play with the pup and have him warm up to me with some more treats. He shook his head and decided to watch TV. As we did this, my parents came home and threw a hissy fit. However, Sid fell in love with Uli and we were allowed to keep him. My phone vibrated, alerting me that I had a new email notification. I unlocked my phone and had found I had received a PM from fanfiction. My heart skipped a beat and I held my chest as I swallowed hard. With haste, I logged back into fanfiction. The little PM box glowed with a parenthesized one. I eagerly clicked on it as I felt my heart ready to jump out my chest.

**pristinehate: _YAY! I was thinking about you the other day and how I didn't have your number anymore after getting a new phone! I was going to message you but I didn't think you got on this anymore because I remember you saying you weren't writing much because you didn't have a computer… I'm fine but I have so much to tell you. I don't even know where to start._**

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.

**Green-Titanium-Alloy: _OH MY GOD YOU'RE ALIVE YAY!_**

Was that a little too much? We began to message back and forth. Although, I felt I overloaded him with messages but Sheik felt right at home with my excessive spiel. I grinned, hoping we would message each other some more. We filled each other in, talked of old days and fanfiction. Red smiled and shook his head at my glowing face and went back to his television.

**Green-Titanium-Alloy: _Sheik, should we move our conversation to cell phones? We've gone through 8 pages lol_**

**pristinehate: Yeah man, the new number is 347-592-0084**

I added him to my contacts and we began to text back and forth. My heart fluttered; I felt so excited, so motivated. I haven't felt this energy in months. I was happy, beyond happy. We sent each other goofy photos and called; his voice was so good to hear. "Your voice hasn't changed a bit, Sheik," I smiled. "Yeah, well, yours did!" he teased. "Cut me some slack, I'm going through puberty!" The Sheikah laughed, having likely forgotten. He had five years on me but we connected so well; age never mattered. We would forget there was a difference at all.

He had explained that he was going through some serious issues; he wasn't himself then and just too much had happened. He lost my number in the process and he didn't know how to message me. Great minds think alike, yeah? When he hung up and promised to call back, a familiar sadness filled me but I couldn't help but be release a tear when he had called back, more than once. Goddesses, why does he get to me? Why does he make me so happy? Either way, I hope he's here to stay. Red and Dark seemed to think otherwise; they weren't as fond of Sheik as I was and I didn't care. We stood up all night and the little pup curled up into my legs as I fed him another treat.

I guess this was my sweet chocolate bar; I'm just dreading for when I have to revisit the doctor to have my blood taken again. That unnerving pressure, like someone was sitting on my chest, filled me as I was swallowed by negativity. I heaved air and held it for a moment or two, listening to the clock's tick echo throughout the house.

**R&amp;R if you like**


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